A little bit of insight to London; art, bars, cafes, clubs, restaurants, and other things to do in this wonderful multicultural city.

Friday, 24 July 2015

The Tinder Generation

As a Millennial I would consider our generation "the Tinder generation". We're obsessed with online dating. 

 I like to think of it; the online shopping of dating. Swiping on Tinder is like looking through a clothing rack in a store... "no, no, no, no, hmmm... maybe... I guess (it's a match), no, no, no, no, no... etc." Or maybe this is just the female perspective. Everyone puts their own mental parameters. You can choose age and distance limits but then when you're swiping you create other rules. Maybe this week you're only into blond guys, or guys who are smiling in their first photo. Or someone who has a funny bio. So many minor limitations leaving you with the final result of dissatisfaction.

Its hard to tell most of the time who's on Tinder for dating and who's there for chatting or sex. It could be different for each individual match. Inappropriate photos are always a turn off, even if you are only looking for sex. And the older generations call us the sex generation because we don't fall in love but rather just sleep around but I find that we're a generation that deals in extremes. We either sleep around, and date a lot, or what seems to be a lot, or we're serial monogamists calling ourselves "girlfriend girls" and "boyfriend boys".

Of the people who seem to fall in love the stupid temptation of Tinder and other dating apps pushes people to be unfaithful or to know the second they break up they have 50 rebounds at the ready. Recently many of my friends have ended up in relationships through Tinder, one of my closest friends has been dating her Tinder boyfriend for over a year. This coupling off is really inconsistent though, for every person in a relationship you know, there are 10 who are not. So why is it still so hard to find a date in a big city like London?

Do we just not put ourselves out there? Last night I went clubbing. My friend and I danced we a couple different guys, yet some how we didn't end up with any phone numbers, all these boys seemed to want was a good grope and a kiss if they were lucky. Is Tinder making it harder for us to interact face-to-face? It seems as though its making us more timid. In English culture "liquid courage" (alcohol) seems to be an imperative part of dating, but is that any better than something like Tinder? Is Tinder just a facilitator or is it ruining us for the future, will we stop talking to the people we're interested in completely because we're afraid of rejection?

It's hard to tell. Overall, people find hiding behind a screen easy, its the human conversation that people struggle with. If you're afraid of rejection listen to this podcast (the Fearless episode), it teaches you how to make a game out of getting over your fear. And if you still think you can't date offline watch this short film.

Talk soon.